


Out of body

by g0thboyfriend



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Angst, Dysphoria, Feels, Gen, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Suicide, LGBTQ Character, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Noodle, Trans Stuart "2D" Pot, but he's here in spirits, but when is he not, i'm only good at writing sad shit, murdoc is a dick, no russel :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:54:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23692723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/g0thboyfriend/pseuds/g0thboyfriend
Summary: The lives of two different people with two similar experiences;trans guy 2D and trans girl Noodle
Relationships: Murdoc Niccals/Stuart "2D" Pot
Kudos: 26





	1. Stuart

**Author's Note:**

> i originally wrote this story for another fandom but young me sucked at writing,,, so here i am with a better version and with the gorillaz. it's very short but please enjoy :)

Stuart is not like the others.

Stuart is a guy. Rather cute, let's be honest.

Stuart has two arms, two ~~long~~ legs, and all of his head.

Stuart doesn't dare to talk to anyone. He's very shy.

Stuart blushes often. He cries often too, sometimes for no reason.

But Stuart is different from the others.

Stuart doesn't have a flat chest.


	2. Naoki

Naoki is not like the others.

Naoki is different.

However, like the rest, he has two arms and two legs, and luckily all of his head. Like Stuart.

Naoki doesn't know Stuart. Well, he hasn't talked to him yet.

Naoki is not loved.

Being loved, in fact, Naoki doesn't know what it's like. He would like, one day, to feel it. Just to see.

Naoki is a girl

Naoki's name is Noodle.


	3. Noodle

Noodle is a girl.

A bit masculine, that she hates.

Maybe because of her short haircut. Or the too-big shirts that hide her curves.

Oh, that's right, Noodle doesn't have curves.

Noodle is not a girl.

Her mother doesn't stop reminding her.

"You're not a girl!" She would always repeat.

Noodle cries a lot because of her mother.

Noodle hasn't really liked her, for some times.

Since her mother said something.

Something Noodle would never forget.

"You're not my child."


	4. Murdoc

Murdoc.

Murdoc was the one Stuart loved.

Murdoc was everything for Stuart.

Murdoc, Murdoc, Murdoc...

Stuart would have done anything to be with him

Murdoc, oh gods, Murdoc.

Stuart loved Murdoc like he never loved anyone else.

Murdoc, oh, my Murdoc.

Murdoc knew the feelings that Stuart had for him, he wasn't stupid.

Murdoc... Why?

Murdoc was clear with Stuart, the poor Stuart.

Murdoc, everything is your fault... Murdoc.


	5. Three

Three.

The number of hours Stuart passed at the record store every week.

Three.

The number of times Noodle fought with her mother, this week.

Three.

The number of times Stuart hesitated to talk to Noodle.

Three.

The number of times Noodle saw Stuart, one time around a café, and two times at the record store.

Three.

The number of seconds it took for them to become friends.


	6. You're not a boy

"You're not a boy, you're just pretending to be!"

It was how Murdoc rejected Stuart.

She ruined everything. Or _he_ ruined everything. Stuart didn't know, he was lost.

Was it his fault? Was it bad to accept yourself? To show his real form?

He accepted himself like he was, but it wasn't of importance if Murdoc didn't like him.

Maybe his hair would grow thicker if he shaved.

And so Stuart shaved everything. His face, his arms, his legs... everything.

Maybe like that, he would love him?

Then he moved to his veins.

Maybe like that, Stuart would be a real boy.


	7. You're not a girl

"-but you're not a girl, Naoki!"

Actually I'm Noodle, mom.

"Oh _Kami_ , when will you understand me?"

And you, when will you understand _me_?

"You're not my child, I don't want to see you!"

Oh yeah? Are you sure of what you're saying?

"Go away! Naoki, Noodle, I don't care. Disappear from my life!"

So I have to disappear? She said I had to disappear.

_Clack!_

"Naoki? Naoki, come back here!"

No, I have to disappear. If I had the chance to write a letter, it would have said...

 _Sorry._

Here, I'm ready to leave.

"Na-Noodle! Open the door!"

I'm gone, mom.

"Noodle?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm definitely not crying from writing this


End file.
